Monday 11 May 2009

Shit Films and the Girls Who Love Them!

It's no secret that I'm a fan of bad films. Not just Congo/Anaconda style mainstream fayre but the kind that you find in the bargain bin in Poundland (you can imagine what a bargain THAT is...). After being led to this gem of a site http://www.coverbrowser.com/covers/vhs-videos I've found not only films I've seen that I'd long forgotten about, but also films I must track down just because they look so bad. I don't know why I do it to myself - more often than not I end up feeling like I've wasted 2 hours of my life yet the anticipation of the next cheap movie is just too strong! Here are some gems I must own but am not willing to pay more than £2 for...
Come on; you know that's just a really bad ploy to make people pick up what is essentially going to be a pile of Tosh! It's bloody Robocop! He wasn't a vampire!
The Tag line alone has sold this to me: " The X Killer is too insane to be caught. This ex-cop is just mad enough to try." Starring Wings Hauser no less! If you said "Who?" then you're correct!

Corey Haim = bad at the best of times.

Nazi zombies? Give them some dinosaurs to ride and we have a blockbuster on our hands!

I saw this when I like 12 and thought it was pretty bad. It's kind of like a Predator/Aliens rip-off starring Rutgar Hauer. In London. Ugh...


I own this piece of crap. It's full of misleads to who the killer is that just ends up making no sense in the end! However, it does contain the best-ever facial expression of someone perving on a couple "making out" in their car.

I thought Gleaming the Cube was a bad name (and film). But Eat the Peach?!


Anything with Ninja in the title is a crap film winner in my book.

5 comments:

  1. I've seen "Split Second" - it truly is awful - I bought it in a double-bill with the equally Rutger-tastic "Wedlock". But did you notice that Stephen Norrington who did "Blade" and "The League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen" did the special effects? FACT.

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  2. The local Cash Convertors used to do loads of shite straight to video movies but in recent years they've been all but removed and replaced with crap DVDs, which don't have the same feel to me. It's been years since I picked up a so-bad-it's-good ex-rental. Sigh...

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  3. Luckily, we have an awesome shop around the corner from us called Hollywood Nites that seem to specialize in all the DVD's you get free with a crap DVD player. Ever wanted to see George Clooney in The Magic Bubble or Red Surf? I can hook you up! XD

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  4. Genius. It was always my dream to open up a video rental shop just like the ones we used to have as kids with films you've never heard of in boxes from your wildest nightmares.

    Double sigh...

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  5. "Anything with Ninja in the title is a crap film winner in my book."

    Are u mad? American Ninja ftw.

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